Wow, I have so many ideas of what to make a blog post of that there is just to many to organize. And if you know me well, you are aware that I hate throwing things away, especially ideas. I can talk about my current, minor obsessions..?
1. My new Warped Tour 2012 CD
2. Hunger Games DVD
3. Goth..
To start off today at Target (best store EVER) I bought the Hunger Games DVD. I have been waiting for this to come out on DVD for the longest time and now that I have it my obsession with Peeta and Josh Hutcherson can slightly be tamed. The first time I saw the film when it came back, I had not read any of the books or really knew the story line. I just watched because of all the hype it was getting. When I did watch it a second time I was obsessed! It took me a while to read the first book, but the second and third book I read in a day each. I am so happy I finally own the DVD. Anyways, while I was at Target I picked up the DVD and just happened to look at the CD section and found the Warped Tour CD. I love the two other years I have so getting the CD was a no brainer. I am listening to it as I type!
My third mini obsession happens to be Goth. I know nothing, about the culture, music, or literature that goes along with goth. However I am pretty obsessed with the make up and fashion part of the culture. Some of my clothing and accessories I do considered to be pretty goth. I especially love watching goth videos on YouTube, My favorite users are kazlovesbats, KINGgutterface, PorcelainPanicc, rottenzombiefairy, SebastianTheGirl, and batcavedilema. These are my favorite youtubers to watch. I am just so interested in the Gothic culture like I was obsessed with Scene and Emo for a while.
I would love to keep on typing but its pretty late at night, well for my parents anyways. I promise to make another post soon. Oh and BTW I got a nose and Monroe piercing haha I am a rebel
About Me
- Oliviaba7x
- Hi my name is Olivia. I am a High School Grad from 2010. I want to own my own business or just work in fashion. My family and friends mean everything to me. My blog is about my life, the troubles I face, and the adventures I want to document.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Lobotomies, cutting, and the animal I have become
Lobotomy: Pretty strong and unusual subject I suppose. I finally watched Sucker Punch...most of it (had to feed my on going addiction to Temple Run) anyways, that almost last scene I suppose where you see her after the lobotomy, the incidents that happened....wow! Shes completely not there anymore, and the look on her face is haunting. Like my many other obsessions of mine I researched "lobotomy" many times and all the possible side effects. Is it crazy that I want one? Something that will calm me down and leave me less violent. Don't get me wrong I am not violent at all towards others, but the thought of getting a lobotomy is intriguing.
Cutting: If I haven't mentioned this before, which I pretty sure I haven't I am a cutter. I have cut my wrists, thighs, upper arms, and possibly other places 128+ times. It seems like a lot but in defense after 4 years I believe it evens out. Not much scars left except a possibility of 6 (from recent cutting) luckily for me they have all faded pretty nicely. I actually like my scars to fade, when they fade I fee like the problems that went with them fade as well. I do not cut because I am emo or because I want to kill myself. It calms me down, and I know it is not the best, but I feel secure. I haven't cut in a couple of weeks, but I am contemplating it right now. Probably won't act out on in until after Easter so my wrists don't look so ugly.
Animal I have become by Three Days Grace: Like my lobotomy fantasy I have developed yet another one thanks to this song. Actually make that two. First I want to go back in time, four years from now and be stuck in like a P.E. class with my peers who thought I was a loner or just odd. The have adult men come after me and tell me they are going to lock me in an insane asylum. And at first I act calm, but something snaps inside my mind and I refuse to go with them. And in total bad ass manner I some how know martial arts and just start fighting guards off. Maybe I take a hostage, and pull a gun out and tell them they can't take me. I fantasize about this when I listen to the song, but yet when it ends I never completely know if I escaped or what goes down in the end. I really want to be seen as a bad ass. Oh and Monster by Skillet is also a similar song to animal i have become but it reminds me to much of my ex so yeah... =] My second fantasy is creating a music video to this song, full on lip synching, black and white, and props. Might act out on this one if I get a new camera.
Might Update in another post... but I leave you all with this
"I can't escape this hell/So many times I've tried/But I'm still caged inside/Somebody get me through this nightmare/I can't control myself/So what if you can see the darkest side of me?No one will ever change this animal I have become"
Cutting: If I haven't mentioned this before, which I pretty sure I haven't I am a cutter. I have cut my wrists, thighs, upper arms, and possibly other places 128+ times. It seems like a lot but in defense after 4 years I believe it evens out. Not much scars left except a possibility of 6 (from recent cutting) luckily for me they have all faded pretty nicely. I actually like my scars to fade, when they fade I fee like the problems that went with them fade as well. I do not cut because I am emo or because I want to kill myself. It calms me down, and I know it is not the best, but I feel secure. I haven't cut in a couple of weeks, but I am contemplating it right now. Probably won't act out on in until after Easter so my wrists don't look so ugly.
Animal I have become by Three Days Grace: Like my lobotomy fantasy I have developed yet another one thanks to this song. Actually make that two. First I want to go back in time, four years from now and be stuck in like a P.E. class with my peers who thought I was a loner or just odd. The have adult men come after me and tell me they are going to lock me in an insane asylum. And at first I act calm, but something snaps inside my mind and I refuse to go with them. And in total bad ass manner I some how know martial arts and just start fighting guards off. Maybe I take a hostage, and pull a gun out and tell them they can't take me. I fantasize about this when I listen to the song, but yet when it ends I never completely know if I escaped or what goes down in the end. I really want to be seen as a bad ass. Oh and Monster by Skillet is also a similar song to animal i have become but it reminds me to much of my ex so yeah... =] My second fantasy is creating a music video to this song, full on lip synching, black and white, and props. Might act out on this one if I get a new camera.
Might Update in another post... but I leave you all with this
"I can't escape this hell/So many times I've tried/But I'm still caged inside/Somebody get me through this nightmare/I can't control myself/So what if you can see the darkest side of me?No one will ever change this animal I have become"
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